All stories in El Jalapeño are satire and not real news. Check out the original article here.

MEXICO CITY — An estimated 50,000 fans of Korean boy band BTS filled the Zócalo on Wednesday afternoon, arriving from early morning to secure positions, waiting in the sun for approximately six hours, and were rewarded at 5 p.m. with a five-minute appearance during which the group stood on the National Palace balcony, waved, said hello in English, and left.

There was no music. There was no singing. One member attempted three sentences in Spanish. The crowd was the population of a medium-sized Mexican city. Representatives from the crowd confirmed that it had been worth it, that they would do it again, and that they were already saving for 2027.

BTS member RM told the assembled crowd: “Hello, Mexico. We are BTS. Thank you so much for coming to see us. We can’t wait for tomorrow’s concert. I love you, thank you so much.” This statement, which contains 34 words and took approximately 18 seconds to deliver, was an event for which people had travelled from multiple states and stood in the sun since 10 a.m.

Member V, known for his musical range, vocal ability, and extensive artistic output, followed by saying he did not speak Spanish very well and then speaking a small amount of Spanish.

The appearance had been coordinated by Mexico’s Culture Minister following a direct diplomatic exchange between President Claudia Sheinbaum and the government of South Korea, making it the first time in recent memory that a bilateral diplomatic communication between two sovereign nations was initiated specifically so that a crowd could watch someone wave.

Sheinbaum, appearing alongside BTS on the balcony, told the group they had to come back next year, a statement delivered with the authority of a head of state and received by the band with the expression of people who were not sure if this was a request or an official government position. BTS agreed to review its schedule.

V’s three sentences in Spanish have been transcribed, translated, and posted to seventeen fan accounts. They have collectively received 4.2 million likes. The sentences were about missing Mexico. Mexico confirmed that it also misses BTS. Diplomatic relations are excellent.

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