Where do I put my freaking car?

Where do I begin to talk about the problems with driving in Mexico? They say that a truly wealthy community is not one where the poor drive cars, but where the well off use public transportation.

And I’ll tell you what, folks: Mexico ain’t there yet.

So here I am, one of many doofuses clogging up the streets with her car and griping about all the other doofuses also driving their cars. The nerve!

Seriously, though. It’s become a pretty big deal in my home city of Xalapa. And from what I hear, it’s becoming a big problem in other parts of Mexico, too.

Opportunities for stress-induced heart attacks? Oh, let me count the ways!

The main issue, of course, is simply the presence of too many cars concentrated in too-small areas. Xalapa especially is suffering: this pre-Hispanic city wasn’t made for all these vehicles.

The streets are narrow, many only permitting one car to pass at a time if anyone’s parked on the side of the street. (Pro tip: unless it’s a tow zone, there is always someone parked on the side of the street, and usually both.) Is driving through iiiiiitty-bitty spaces while a line of cars behind you honk your thing? If so, this could be your place.

Corners are fair game, making pulling out onto a busy avenue an exciting game of Russian Roulette. Several stoplights might be stacked together in one place at a 7-street intersection. Trying to figure out which one is yours can turn into a downright heart stopping calculation.

Casually waiting for the light to change while on the unguarded train tracks as a train comes speeding toward you is also…an experience. You’d move, but to where?

Double parking is another favorite thing to do, right there in the middle of the lane. Know where your hazard lights button is for sudden surprise stops. You’re going to need to use them at least a couple times a week!

The limits of Mexican congeniality

As polite as Mexicans are face to face, driving is a different story: in a car, you can be anonymously selfish. That means blocking traffic or exits because you need to pop into a store, and there’s no parking anyway. It means not letting other cars over even though the incorporation lane is all of 10 meters long. It means speeding past the long line of cars to butt in at the front.

And my city has a reputation for polite drivers! They mostly are, of course, but even if only one out of 50 people are jerks, it only takes a few to back things up for everyone.

Where are the transit police to put order to this mess, you may ask? Mostly hanging around waiting to fine people for not having the properly updated stickers on their vehicles. Sigh.

It’s getting out of hand, even as new car dealerships happily set up shop.

Any Solutions?

Unfortunately, not really. Not immediate ones, anyway.

There are just too many cars and not enough space for them where the drivers want to take them.

And don’t get me wrong, I’m not blaming people for having cars. Many people need cars these days precisely because we have too many cars: it’s a self-perpetuating problem. Gone are the days where you could hop on a bus and get to your destination all of five minutes later than if you’d driven. Buses are stuck in the traffic too, now, so you might even be better off walking if it’s close-ish.

This, my friends, is an infrastructure problem. And while I commend projects to adapt the roads to expand the flow of traffic, it does little to relieve the problem. It’s like the Field of Dreams: if you build it, they will come. The cars, that is. And then more cars, and then more cars.

Oddly, parking lots are not being built: it’s like we collectively want to make things hard on people. “Sorry, there’s just nowhere else to put my car!”

So I don’t know, maybe more parking lots? Or even better, how about some trains — and let’s guard those tracks with railing, please?

And for goodness sake: when you can, leave your car at home.

Sarah DeVries is a writer and translator based in Xalapa, Veracruz. She can be reached through her website, sarahedevries.substack.com.