Thursday, March 5, 2026

El Jalapeño: Trump suggests ‘El Mencho’ would be ‘tremendous’ leader for Iran — calls him ‘very strong, very tough’

All stories in El Jalapeño are satire and not real news. Check out the original article here.

WASHINGTON — Describing the Jalisco New Generation Cartel boss as “exactly what Iran needs right now,” President Trump told reporters Tuesday that late drug lord Nemesio “El Mencho” Oseguera Cervantes would make a “fantastic, possibly incredible” Supreme Leader of Iran, praising the cartel kingpin’s “very powerful management style” and “beautiful instincts.”

“He knows how to run an organization, frankly better than most politicians. He’s tough, he’s smart, he built something from nothing — that’s what I respect,” Trump said, adding that El Mencho had “more energy than Khamenei ever did, and believe me, I knew Khamenei, not well, but I knew him.”

cjng chief El Mencho
From fentanyl to fatwas, is this the man that Donald Trump wants to install in Iran? (US Department of Justice)

Trump reportedly became interested in El Mencho after a briefing on Iranian leadership succession ran long and he began free-associating about “strong men” he admired, at one point also suggesting Tony Soprano before being reminded the character is fictional.

The State Department has declined to comment, while the Treasury Department, which previously had a US $15 million bounty on El Mencho, described the proposal as “creating some internal tension.”

Iranian officials called the suggestion “an insult,” while several Jalisco cartel members expressed cautious optimism about the benefits package.

It is unclear if Trump knew that El Mencho was killed two weeks ago.

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